Throughout my highschool life it became something of a tradition to celebrate New Year’s Eve in a way that highly underwhelmed my initial expectations for the festivities. There was one exception to this rule, and it was in my senior year. It is my compilation of failure, however, that is much more entertaining and cringeworthy. This being said, no failure was quite as spectacular as my Junior year New Years A New Year’s Evening so bad it reached unforeseen heights of terribleness.
Like any pitiful New Years it began with the realization that most of my friends were out of town. What was left locally was a hodgepodge of chums who didn’t quite have the cache that my friends out of town had, and whose relationships to each other were strung quite loosely together. Picture your favorite type of candy. Now imagine the generic store brand version of that candy. You know it tastes just as delicious and it’s cheaper, but you just have to get past that awfully boring packaging. Now imagine that your candy is struggling with it’s interpersonal skills, and you have essentially reached a good representation of my amigos for the night.
Now I can say with fairly strong confidence that me and my friends all spent the earlier hours of the day doing the same thing; waiting. Sure we all kept busy in a different assortment of ways trying to mask our anticipation for the night, but what we were all really doing was waiting for that first text. Waiting for the game to begin. Now the game I refer to is essentially like any other game. It involves strategy and wit, and can become intensely heated. Each person has an agenda that has to be met. Most agenda’s follow under the large umbrella that is social gatherings, most notably the house party. Upon the fortunate arrival at said party, each person may have sub-agendas that they would like to fulfill as well. Fulfilling these goals alone can be quite hard, and that is why we have friends. Every other player in the game has an asset or two that can help your goal have a higher rate of success. In this way, the game often stretches way beyond your window, as the web grows bigger and bigger before all agendas are exhausted, and in order to play it is essential that you have an asset. Some examples of assets; various kinds of illicit material, being able to drive, an address, and god forbid the pleasure of one’s company. The latter of those examples is usually at the bottom of the totem pole or even worse a deficit.
A deficit is a usually a restriction in your own agenda that will only inconvenience others. Sometime’s it’s just for a night, other times it can last for weeks, and sometimes your just born an ugly asshole. Some examples of deficits include; having to be home early, an annoying diet, an annoying girlfriend, having too much “game”, needing to swing by that church parking lot to pick up your illicit materials, and literally being a male. There are various others aspects to the game, but for the purpose of this story i will only be referencing what we have covered thus far.
It was around 5 o’clock that I heard my phone buzz. Finally! I picked it up with exhilaration.
Text From Luke
– Hey bud, have any plans for tonight?
And like that I had become a player in the game. It was early for a normal night, but quite late for an occasion like New Year’s eve. I would have to make up time and fast as I knew I was low on assets for the night.
Text from me to Luke
-Idk I’m still weighing my options
Now I’ll let you in on a little secret; I didn’t really have any options. I needed to create the illusion that I had plans so that Luke would think I contained assets.